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I look out on a cold, cold morning
At a sky layered with clouds
Like cream being folded unto cream
In a sweet dish of cupcakes.

I smell the sweet, sweet winds
From a place unknown
Does it carry a whisper from a friend
A prayer from a stranger
Or a child?s dream
For me, an unknown..

I see the land
As parched as the peoples eyes
Dried of happiness, drained of tears
Pulled by years.

Yet waiting for the rains
These ruthless clouds had promised,
Is white the color of purity,
Or a color to mask the loss of dignity?
In an uncouth place of pleasures
Where take only remains
And given back is Nothing.

In this once blessed land
Of seas and deserts and Sun,
Where God thought He'd build his home
I see now a void amidst
The horizon and
Where the beanstalk is said to end.

DELILAH'S DREAM

In the land of God
There was nothing to see and get surprised,
For below was the grey, passionate sea
...And the waves with their mighty calls.

And above was a blinding light
And in nothing in between.

And among the land of clouds
Whispers seered into her

"Fear not..
To jump from the window of time
chained with comfort
Into the sea of nether-ness
I am here to catch you Delilah
Over and above the swallowing emptiness
You grasp the life of that moment
Until you last, forever Delilah"
And then you call that
HEAVEN

CRYSTAL BANGLES

In the dark corners, in the fake lights, amidst the sleeping lives,
Lie the weeping whispers of an unknown
Lie the wails of a soul so lone…
Cold she is, shattered is her heart, broken into shards of countless crystals,
Flesh and nails grinding inside,
When time and time again she begged
“Not anymore… No more…. No more….”
Until the voice inside her, died..When the devil’s foot pounded on her head,
Gnarling teeth, devious hunger, vicious wetness
All over a withering soul,
Crushing her hair, once long black locks
Now no more, now no more…
When the womb that bore
The cursed life now
Wailed from her bosom
Once the vessel of elixir for
This broken life, this unwanted life
Uncared for, unseen by
That bears the mark of Satan and his sons,
Where was that god, some god who said
“Everything happens for goodness”
That’s all…
Where is this moment, draining into the ocean of virtues and all that’s good?
Where is that god, where is he lurking?
Is he lying in a corner
Too high, too stoned!
When everything went dark, bloody, painful and empty
Where was the one who gave that royal princess
An extra yard length of dignity, when she was stripped,
and stripped of Spirit and love
For an audacious audience of courtiers in the darbar of pleasures..
Does he favour the royal, does he incline for the beautiful?
Oh but she is none, has never been one
And now will not be anything .. No more..
The shrieks ring in the head, the pain tears the heart to two
Of hers, her body’s, her self’s, her being ..
All I can see with closed or opened eyes
The kerosene lamp that gave the wretched glow
On that fateful night,
When a woman’s honour was the doormat of the ceremony
And a mother’s tears
Became untold of…

~ for Kunjammi


( this poem is for every woman who has had the misfortune of being snatched of her life's dignity mercilessly.. Kunjammi is just one among the millions)

And they thought Johnny Depp was a loser!

After an explicitly “short” hiatus I return back with a thought that might disturb many of us when we read, bringing back memories of the worst days of our lives. The ignominy of having to get hit on your arm till abrasions appeared on it just because you screamed out across the assembly hall the name of your best friend and you were just five years old. A five year old who didn’t know how loud her voice should have been when she was playing with her friend just on her way to the class!
Years back a shocking controversy had appeared about a teacher locking up a student who had barely reached a “double digit age” in her car in Dubai and the child died of asphyxiation after being locked up in a car which had no glasses rolled down for hours. How much can the small lungs of a child’s take up carbon dioxide was aware to everybody else other than that woman. Of course if she was a tad saner, patient, prudent and a caring person all that was required were words of caution accompanied with a soothing touch and stern voice to keep the child a lamb in the class!
Corporal punishment shouldn’t alone be banished from the decorum of school teaching. A patient person should only think of being a teacher, just like a compassionate human thinking of being a doctor. Teaching is the best profession in this world as far as my convictions are concerned. No adult is going to remember a teacher for the words of scorns that pricked her/his thoughts like thorns! All the teachers out there, never a consider child worthless and make it a subject of your incessant verbal and physical torture just because he/she does not possess the caliber academically. Remember Johnny Depp was a school dropout at 13 and well I needn’t continue with who Johnny Depp is today right :)
I have had the luck of having a few teachers who were gems of people and a few many more who were worser than rotten eggs! No offense to the latter since they have brought about nil effects on me and my ability to solve mental maths with their blade edged wooden scale tactics on my tiny pink hands which did turn redder just to add to the woes of an even more sensitive mother of mine. All that comes to my face is a smile partly of pity and partly of ridicule when I think about them. And those days. And now..
Parents and teachers are the creators, the moulders of an adults perception of the world, his/her life, his/her thoughts about living here and having to deal with this enormous task and emerge out a survivor. No amount of comparison is going to help a child become a better human being tomorrow. It definitely hasn’t helped me, for a while it just gave me a rather unhealthy competitive spirit which I find if anything futile today! If a child is taught to deal with his/her problems in their own way instead of asking them to adopt the techniques used by another child especially when it comes to studying, if she/he is assisted properly in this mammoth task of having to fit in the proper crowd with helping hands and loving words, there is no amount that the person would thank you later on. I am indebted to those who have instiled in me that I am a winner even if I’d score a C in my term exams.
Teachers shape one. Ones interest in subjects be it history, language, science, music and the highly intimidating mathematics, a teacher is one of the very vital people who can guide you to your choice destination in life. And no form of insult or squidging a pen between the developing knuckles of a child is going to make an individual reach the spot faster. All that it helps achieving velocity is in the construction of the pile of frustration that can be induced in the adult as a consequence of the trauma that was once attained because of an ill tempered teacher.
I take this opportunity through my blog to thank all my teachers (no doubt, especially the angels among them) and also reproach through my thoughts the ones that ridiculed me and hit me till I thought I was a loser until my ever growing confidence and faith creeped in..
“ We are beautiful in every single way, as words cant bring us down”(courtesy:Christina Aguilera) .. Neither can flogs.
To every adult out there, remember every child does carry the sting and the kisses you give them in their heart on an equal measure. They are the adults with a better and bigger conscience than us...